Reflections on Style
I've spent the last few months trying on different personas. I've hit a space where nothing is being planned or has been set into motion, and I'm trying to enjoy the freedom of it all. With that, it looks like grad school will have to wait a while, since I'm too busy enjoying this moment. What to do with the time? I figured a little self-re-invention is in order and thus the 30 day experiment was born. And since I'm doing some work on the inside, I figured I'd do some to outside as well.
This has manifested most notably in more adventurous fashion choices. Legwarmers, vintage handbags, ties, and large jewelry have been my accessories of choice lately. But, while the combinations are new, these choices themselves aren't challenging. I feel great when I wear them, but I don't feel like I'm testing myself by wearing them. For example, I thought I'd try something a little more professional-looking without losing the funkiness of my usual style. This is actually much trickier than what I normally choose to wear, both in design and in accompanying mental shift.
Yes, it's true what thousands of black women and gay men have said before me, "Girl, you have to own that outfit!" The ability to "own it" always starts in your head, and what occured to me is that I feel like a fraud when I'm dressed up to go to the office. In the same way that women often say, "I wish I could wear (insert style here) clothes, but I just can't carry it off." There's nothing really stopping them from wearing it, other than the feeling of costume that accompanies it. So, I guess my task is, since I value flexibility in myself and in others, is find a way to make that style my own; to put together some outfits I could conceivably wear to interviews without feeling like I'm sacrificing anything. After all, I enjoy marking my difference. As a biracial woman it's plenty visible without it, but it makes me feel more comfortable, as if I'm working with my otheredness instead of fighting it. So, to that end, I'm stretching myself by trying different styles of clothing, and although it's not one clear cut thing to itemize on my list, it is a part of the project.
Wish me luck...and digital camera to record the results. ;)
This has manifested most notably in more adventurous fashion choices. Legwarmers, vintage handbags, ties, and large jewelry have been my accessories of choice lately. But, while the combinations are new, these choices themselves aren't challenging. I feel great when I wear them, but I don't feel like I'm testing myself by wearing them. For example, I thought I'd try something a little more professional-looking without losing the funkiness of my usual style. This is actually much trickier than what I normally choose to wear, both in design and in accompanying mental shift.
Yes, it's true what thousands of black women and gay men have said before me, "Girl, you have to own that outfit!" The ability to "own it" always starts in your head, and what occured to me is that I feel like a fraud when I'm dressed up to go to the office. In the same way that women often say, "I wish I could wear (insert style here) clothes, but I just can't carry it off." There's nothing really stopping them from wearing it, other than the feeling of costume that accompanies it. So, I guess my task is, since I value flexibility in myself and in others, is find a way to make that style my own; to put together some outfits I could conceivably wear to interviews without feeling like I'm sacrificing anything. After all, I enjoy marking my difference. As a biracial woman it's plenty visible without it, but it makes me feel more comfortable, as if I'm working with my otheredness instead of fighting it. So, to that end, I'm stretching myself by trying different styles of clothing, and although it's not one clear cut thing to itemize on my list, it is a part of the project.
Wish me luck...and digital camera to record the results. ;)
posted by CJ at 12:25 PM
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